Dirty Birds


Dirty Birds




140 Mins.

Platinum X Pictures


DIRECTOR: Tim Von Swine

THEMES: English Girls, Anal Sex, Double Anal,




STARS: Alicia Rhodes, Poppy Morgan, Michelle B, Isabelle Ice, Sophie Dee,


It’s about time the English girls got their own movie. We have seen a number of really hot British chicks in US porn recently and after waiting forever they are finally all thrown together in their own gonzo movie. We may be too late for Nici Sterling, Sarah-Jane Hamilton, Layla Jade, Jessie J and some other hot Birds, but we can certainly enjoy Alicia Rhodes, Poppy Morgan and Michelle B. They are sure to be run through the wringer here with plenty of hard cocks penetrating every hole they have. The girls are certainly hot and the action is simple in another couch porn with short interviews to warm us up and hot mouths talking dirty with those awesome British accents.

Poppy Morgan is really cute and reminds me of the sort of girl that Ben Dover used to find every once in a while. We get a chance to check out her body during a few minutes of tease footage. There is a short interview that lets us hear her voice and discover that she can actually string three sentences together. That’s always nice. Tea Reel gets to play with Poppy and though is a few inches shorter than she is, has enough dick to make her happy. I like the way she works his balls, especially when she sucks them hard enough to make them pop out of her mouth. There is a bit of head grabbing, but mostly we are treated to a first class blowjob from a woman who is super cute and really knows what she’s doing. Spreading those pretty thighs she enjoys her turn on the receiving end of some head. Mounting his cock, she starts riding it as it were hitting every one of her hot spots at once. We get some really good shots of her ass though the camera seems to moving a lot more than it needs to during this scene. By the time they switch into reverse cowgirl she looks ready to keep fucking him until her body collapses. Tea is happy to pound away or to let her ride and Poppy gets off on both. They have great energy together and Poppy looks good enough to keep things interesting even as the scene hits the 30 minute mark. Things do start to feel a bit long near the end, but with her perky tits shaking and a nice load on the face things wrap up in a really hot manner. I love the way the camera lingers as she rubs his shrinking cock on her cum-streaked face.

Michelle B is a tall blonde who looks beautiful and has a very dirty mouth. I have interviewed this girl so I know how tough it is to talk to her without staring at her tits. Tim does a pretty good job though the camera moves too much again. It’s just a bit disorienting. Once she stops talking it is time to start sucking. With two big cocks to play with Michelle looks right at home. Steve Holmes wants her to hold those big tits together so he can fuck them. I love this part of the scene and only wish we had seen more double sucking before the fucking starts. Once it does she is quite willing to scream when not sucking as her pussy gets stretched from behind. It doesn’t take them long to maneuver her into position for some hard DP. I wish the camera would stay put a bit more, but it is hard to complain about such great looking stuff. Since Michelle has such long legs it is actually a little hotter when only one guy is fucking her so that her legs can flail about in the air. Moving quickly from her ass to her tits to her mouth and back again, it almost feels like we’re watching the movie with the fast-forward button pressed down. Let’s go for decaf next time and really enjoy what she has to offer. She certainly enjoys the massive loads that paint her face and drip down to cover her hot tits. Michelle is a very pretty girl who knows how to get dirty. We need to see a lot more of her.

We’ve seen Isabelle before and she’s fucking nasty. She is looking really cute in this scene as well. Her scenes are always hot and I can’t think of too many girls who match her for sexual intensity. Randy Spears and John Strong won’t exactly challenge her, but Randy has a huge toy from Isabelle’s own bag that really stretches her ass properly. That makes it easy for her to roll over and take everything John has with ease. Something about the way she takes anal makes me think that the guys are going to have to double up on her to her make her even feel like she’ working today. One cock in the bum just seems beyond easy for Isabelle. DP works a little better and she is able to handle the action without too many A2M breaks. After easily handling the double dick action she takes their cream on her face and then scoops up every drop so that she can swallow it all. Isabelle is a very dirty bird and probably one of the more under-rated (even by me) performers in the biz.

Steve Holmes is on the couch with Sophie Dee. She is a twenty-one year old blonde with a pretty face and a great rack. When Steve takes her tits out we are treated to one serious natural rack. He gets her in the mood by licking her pussy, but Sophie can’t be happy unless her mouth is full of cock. His pole is a bit too big for her, but she does a decent job anyway. It fits much more easily into her pussy and we get to watch those lovely breasts swaying beneath her as Holmes pushes deep into her twat. It takes her a while to really warm up, but eventually her energy level climbs up into the same ballpark with the other girls from the flick. Because she isn’t exactly tearing it up though the scene does drag more than the others. Unless you’re really into watching her tits bounce (and they are impressive) then this scene is probably going to leave you colder than the others. I do think she’s cute and love the way she swallows cum. It just isn’t fair to put her after Isabelle because no one will look nasty after that queen of cum.

Speak of cum queens and here comes Alicia Rhodes. This busty blonde turns me on as much as anyone in porn and she loves showing off. She would be hot even without the accent, but when you throw that into the mix it is amazing to me that Tim was able to shoot her without throwing down the camera and shagging her raw. Three guys are brought in to fill her up and Alicia sucks every dick given to her as if she loves it. They get a little rough with her, but she takes it fine, responding by proving that she is a lot sexier when just allowed to work on her own. Alicia flips over on the couch so that she is in the perfect position to be tit fucked and then to lick balls and ass. Eventually the guys plug all three holes at once, pounding away on her body while she continues to deep throat cock. They eventually get to work with some A2M merry-go-round stuff, but at this point nothing matters. Alicia looks great and is giving us the fuck of the movie. Her energy is fantastic, her tits look great and there is nothing that could make this any better. (Expect perhaps a bit less camera movement.) There is some amazing footage of Alicia on her back taking Manuel Ferarra’s cock up her ass. With no other guys in the way she is free to shine. Of course this fantastic action is followed up by dick rubbing as the guys share her ass (and each other) during double anal. Thankfully they don’t stay in there for too long and we get to watch her go crazy again as they line up for piledriver anal and then DP her some more. The tit footage is great here, but this time it is coupled with great energy and Alicia’s highly vocal style. Without question this is best scene in the movie even with the double anal. Alicia caps things off by taking all three loads on her pretty face.

Most of the action in this movie is fantastic. It’s interesting that Sophie Dee is the one girl who doesn’t really deliver the goods. She is mentioned negatively in the credits making me wonder if there were some problems leading to the less than brilliant scene. Everyone else is really good. Alicia is fantastic and even manages to keep things rolling as the guys play a game of cock-rub inside of her colon. Her scene is the best of the movie and one of the best I’ve seen in quite some time. Isabelle Ice is great as always and Michelle B really is a great combination of classy looks and filthy slut. I like the sex in this movie quite a bit. In fact my biggest complaint is that that camera seems to move a bit too much at times. It doesn’t ruin anything, but it’s just an overall feeling that it goes one step too far. Of course when I have to reach this far for a negative comment then you know that the movie on the whole is pretty damn good. Pretty damn good if you like sexy English girls behaving like complete tarts that is.


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