2 Young 4 U


2 Young 4 U


85 Mins.

Smash Pictures


THEMES: Young Girls

CONDOMS: None Noted



STARS: Mallory, Lainey, Elizabeth, Lexi, Katrina, Brian Surewood, Herschel Savage, Hamilton Steele, Jeremy Steele & Easton.



So how young is 2 young? I guess that’s what Jimmy D is going to try and show us in this movie. Frankly, I think that is a girl is still using 2’s and 4’s instead too or for, then that’s a pretty good indication that you might want to stay away. If she still dots her I’s with little hearts or smiley faces, that’s a clue as well. On the other hand, if she’s got more ink than the front page of the USA Today, then you are probably safe no matter how much someone in porn wants to P4P her up. Actually I don’t know how much P4P is going to be used in this movie. The only other Smash flick I have seen was pretty straight forward. As long as these girls aren’t 2 young 4 the law, then we’ll be fine.

Mallory and Brian Surewood are security guards who check out a suspicious open door late at night. (Anyone wonder what kind of security guard would wear flip flops?) Inside they find a bondage movie set. Mallory runs around like a kid on a playground. Brian gets a good look at her and as luck would have it, being on the porn set makes the young girl horny. She strips and teases on the bondage cross, showing off a pretty decent body. When her thighs are parted, Brian dives right in and licks her pussy. If Mallory was worried about her older boss, she sure loses those doubts by the time she starts sucking his cock. She has a really active tongue, but doesn’t get much dick into her mouth. Brian makes sure that his dick all fits into her pussy. Reverse cowgirl is good and bad for Mall depending on where the camera is pointed. Her tits are pretty fantastic, but tight shots of her tummy doesn’t do her any favors. They use the bars of a cage for some interesting doggy and then Brian shoots a really big load all over her face. This is a pretty good scene from an average girl.

Lainey fucks up her sink by putting shot glasses into it. Easton is the lucky plumber who fixes it for her. To show her appreciation she does what all girls in porn flicks to do for horny workers. She takes out her tiny tits and lets him suck on them. Lainey has a tight little box that gets plenty of attention before she takes on his tool. There isn’t much there for her to suck, so Lainey moves quickly to mount his dick and ride it. The energy is pretty good in doggy and then when he pumps her in mish. He pulls out and dribbled two drops of cum onto her lips. Lainey looks like she is just disgusted by his jizz.

Hamilton Steele is left in charge of the auto shop. He is only supposed to lock up and not fix any cars, but that wouldn’t be any fun would it? Elizabeth Del Mar shows up with her car smoking. He eyes her and eventually they strike a deal. Hamilton gives he pussy a through check up before letting her check his dipstick with her mouth. The energy in this scene is really lacking so by the time he starts fucking her I’m already wishing we were watching him fix her car. Eventually she shows some life while squatting over his dick, but as he jerks his load onto her tits, everyone looks bored.

Lexi goes door to door selling magazine subscriptions. Jeremy Steele tries to convince her that she needs to improve her sales technique. The dialog only lasts a few minutes, but it seems to take forever. He finally gets her little tits out and goes down to eat her box. Two fingers in her slit don’t seem to do all that much, but she is happy to play with his cock. I don’t know is she learned to suck like this in an after school program, but her eye contact is very good. Her energy level while fucking is about as low as can be though. She rides for a while and then just lies there while he fucks her. By the time he shoots onto her body, she is looking the other way and as bored as I am.

Herschel Savage is used to playing the dirty old man parts these days. He has to tell Katrina that he lost his job for jerking off on the job. She laughs at first, but has a way to make him feel better. Hershel peels off her jeans and doesn’t stop to count all of the little tattooed spots on her lower belly. Sweetie, if you have to give the boys something interesting to read while they are down there, then it’s really a lost cause. Katrina takes his artificially hardened and sucks it. Since she doesn’t have to do much to it, I guess her head is all right. Like so many of the girls in this movie, Katrina just seems bored. She rides Herschel’s cock like she’s sitting in a rocking chair. He shoots his load, what little there is, on her check and we are thankfully to the end of a dreadful video.

It’s pretty tough to have a great fuck flick when the female talent is average at best. There isn’t one of these girls who really stands out here. Some of them are cute, like Lainey and Elizabeth, but the energy level in most of the scenes is just not good enough to even warrant a lukewarm response. Some of the set ups are decent, but the cast needs to be improved a whole lot for the next volume or it will be 2 Boring 2 Pay 2 Dollars 2 Watch.


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