You have to hand it to the guys behind www.BlacksOnBlondes.com. They seem to come up with things to keep us interested and aren’t afraid to shock us along the way. This site features a man called “The Minion.” Some of you will remember that he was a sidekick of Chico Wang’s way back in the day. Minion was always the butt of jokes, abused and used in every humiliating way imaginable. Revenge is sweet though. He may have to put up a lot of crap, but The Minion gets to fuck some really hot girls on this site. The action is pretty wacky on this site, usually involving very messy food play. If you’re into watching fat hairy dudes fucking hot chicks then you have come to the right place. It’s strange, it’s creepy, it’s TheMinion.com
Home: The main features easy to use navigation that takes us to the newest scene, the highest rated scene or a user-generated favorites list. You can also use a drop-down menu to choose whatever girl you want. As of 10/5/08 there are around 60 episodes on TheMinion.com. The two highest rated at this time feature a three way with Desani and Christina Agave and bags full of messy food and then Kara Bare (Shawna Lenee) getting rough with The Minion.
Videos: Each scene or photo gallery has its own description. You can read about what goes on in the scene. Mostly it will help you to figure out what girl is in what scene. Basically the action is pretty much the same, but the sample pictures are often so food-covered that you can’t tell who is who.
There are a number of viewing options available on the videos. You can download the scenes in a dozen or so small segments even on very slow connections. This gives you a chance to have the stuff really quickly. They are also broken into three large segments for medium streams. And if you really want the good stuff, you can watch the whole thing in mid-band or broadband size. (Broadband is 640×480 1.54 mbps. All of them played pretty quickly with no lag time.
The action is pretty much the same in every scene. The Minion, sometimes as his agent character Sleazy D, talks to the camera and stuffs his face. This stuff is just nutty. It reminds me of something you would see if you stole a video camera from a bored stoner. The girls come in and often get to smear food all over his body. In other scenes, he plays up the agent angel and talks shit to the girls while they fuck him.
Not to be mean, but let’s put it on the table. The Minion is a big, fat hairy dude who plays up his own ugliness for the shock value. He lets the girls smear him, spit on him, slap here and basically do whatever they want to him. He is also hung like a small Chihuahua and uses condoms that are three times to big for him in scenes. That works from a comedic standpoint and often makes for bizarre sexual situations. This is not a pretty site, it’s all about freak show porn, sexual oddities and humiliation.
There are some pretty hot chicks on the site fucking the Minion. Perhaps there is his own best revenge. Yes they get to fuck with him, but in the end he gets to slip his tiny dick into the likes of Lucy Thai, Tia Tanaka, Kacey and Christina Agave. I wouldn’t there there is a ton of sexual energy here. Minion is a huge guy with a small dick. There are only so many positions he can do and there is so much attention paid to the humiliation that the sex just seems to be secondary.
With Lucy Thai, he brings her in for an interview for his agency. While he talks to her and makes racist Asian jokes, the Minion keeps eating. She shows off her stunning body and he is unimpressed, but fucks her anyway. The condom hangs off his dick and gets in the way as she sucks his dick. They try for sex, but he is so small that she can barely get him inside. In the end there is a pop on her tits, but this is hardly your standard jerk off scene.
The niche appeal is very high here, but I can see it being quite limited. It is great as a side show as well, but again that doesn’t always make for great stroking.
Kacey offers better sexual energy as she smacks him around while he fucks her. Some of the girls seem to have fun with it while others are clearly just counting the dollars as they smear food all over his hairy body.
This is the sort of site you can’t take your eye off of. It’s creepy, it’s odd and sometimes it’s almost hot.
COST: There are two membership options for this site.
30 Day Membership: $34.99 30 Days
90 Day Membership: $59.99 90 Days
OVERALL: 79 of 100. This is a train wreck site. If you like watching fat hairy guys fuck hot chicks, check
it out. If you are into food fetish play, then definitely check it out. If you like watching fat guys stuff their faces and get totally humiliated then you have found the perfect site for you. It isn’t exactly my cup of tea, but the guys behind sites like www.BlacksOnBlondes.com (Read Review Here), www.WifeWriting.com, www.GloryHole.com (Read Review Here) and of course the other single-girl BBC slut sites like www,KatieThomas.com, www.RuthBlackwell.com, www.BarbieCummings.com and www.CandyMonroe.com definitely know how to make a site that is interesting.
Models: 15 of 20 (Some Sexy Girls)
Quality of Content: 12 of 20 (Interesting, Genre Specific)
Quantity of Content: 16 of 20 (60+ Scenes/Galleries)
Ease of Use: 18 of 20 (Easy to use.)
Niche Appeal: 18 of 20 (Very Specific)
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