Guest Blogger Cindi Loftus: Alt Porn Rocks! Alt Porn Sucks! You Decide

Hi Cindi Loftus here. A coup d’etat has taken place today in the adult website world and I AM IN CHARGE. Today I have taken over RogReviews.com. I figured since Rog hates ALT-porn, especially the movie “Neu Wave Hookers”, the best thing I could do was get a hold of some ALT-porn directors (including Eon McKai, NWH’s creator) and let them say great things about their craft! The opportunity of a lifetime I thought! A chance to say whatever good things they want to; contradict Rog on his own site, and win over a league of new fans in the process! Of course things are never as easy as they seem. Seems some of the directors didn’t want to say anything. And some wanted to say very little. Here is who I heard from, Eon Mckai, Malachi Ecks, Dave Naz & Octavio Winkytiki. Don’t get me wrong, I think all these guys are great people with creative spirits, let’s just say in some cases their responses were underwhelming. Maybe I was just expecting too much. Luckily for me, (and you, or there would be NOTHING here to read today) a couple of them were cool and came through for me. And one especially, Winkytiki, GOT IT, and was funny as hell. I guess he understands that difficult concept that publicity for yourself and your movies is a GOOD thing! (Who woulda thought?!) I’ve put each person’s writing in a different color to hopefully make it easier for you to read, Not sure if the webmasters will be able to post it that way though. [sorry, we couldn’t] Please let me know what you think! Writercindi@bellsouth.net.

First, Rog’s review of NWH that started the whole controversy. I have done lots of shortening here. Rog wrote: Even if I hadn’t just watched it and even if I weren’t fighting the urge to simply type “Wow, did that suck” and call it a day… Eon is the poster boy for alt.porn which seems to me just another excuse to dress up stroke flicks, pretend they are art and then show them off for people who have nothing but utter contempt for the people who make, and more importantly, watch X-rated product. There just aren’t enough words to explain why “Neu Wave Hookers” sucks monkey anus.!
Rog gave the movie an “F”. Which made me curious. So I watched the movie myself and wrote my own review. Here is part of what I wrote about NWH- “Playful, realistic sex, lots of real orgasms, and fabulous music. Whole movie has a B-52’s slash disco slash Goth slash punk slash techno feel all mixed together. Maybe even a bit new wave… Beautiful, but edgy all natural girls who like their job as porn stars and it shows. Neu Wave Hookers, great all around, nothing is missing, make sure that includes U! I give this movie an A!”

So Rog & I totally disagree on this topic. I asked Rog a few question before he left so he could have some say on his site.(SINCE I AM EMPEROR TODAY!)

  • Cindi:How many years have you been writing reviews?
  • Roger:I have been writing reviews for 11 years now.
  • Cindi:How many F’s have you given?
  • Roger:I have only been doing A-F on DVDs (2000 exactly as of right now.) 23
    have been F’s (Neu Wave and Killing Courtney Love were two.)
  • Cindi:Did you just hate Neu Wave Hookers? Or do you hate Alt-Porn in general?
  • Roger:I have hated all alt-porn titles so far, but NWH was especially bad.
    Because of all the reasons I outlined in the review…pretentious crap that
    destroys everything that made the original classic and brilliant. I think it’s all really anti-porn and anti-sex.
  • Cindi:What is your opinion these ALT-PORN directors?
  • Roger:I’ve never met any of them so I have no opinion of them as people. I hear
    Eon just LOVES me. Their work? Eon’s is horrible porn. Malachi- never seen his work other than the BTS stuff. Isn’t Malachi the creepy kid from Children of the Corn? Winky? A porn director or a Teletubbie? Dave Naz? No clue. Who ARE these guys? And why is Vivid throwing money at them?
  • Cindi:Geez, I’m glad you like me! lol. Do you think you could possibly LIKE an ALT movie?
  • Roger:I honestly don’t know. I appreciate good film making, but porn is porn. Anything that takes away from the sex is bad porn. I hate pretentious wanna-be’s who don’t seem to care about or like this industry. I LIKE porn. I LIKE film, but for one to shit on the other just pisses me off. I do like some of the pale, tattooed girls, but the whole alt-thing just seem to be about bisexual male play, making sex ugly and secondary and it’s all wrapped up in a pretentious art school drop out package. Gee, what’s not to like?
  • Cindi:What would it have to be like??
  • Roger:I don’t know. It would have to take a different view of the sex, be as creative as I imagine these guys can be (Remember, I highly praised one great transition in NWH) and actually be GOOD porn.. OK, that’s probably enough to hang myself with :-)
  • Cindi: Ha ha ha ha, I can guarantee that! We have only just begun, and you are not here to defend your self! We are going to have fun! Come on my friends in Alt Porn, step right up and have your say!

ON TO THE DIRECTORS AND THEIR AMAZING (?) RESPONSES!

Malachi Ecks disses me totally, he sends (via several e-mails that I have combined)- I’ll pass. Thank you for loving us though :) I also do not know who Rog is really. It is just entertainment to me. He acts like I knocked up his sister AND Mum. Truthfully I’m over it and I have nothing to defend. Sorry to kind of burst the bubble on the idea. I think it could be funny, but the famous line goes, “Arguing on the internet is like competing in the Special Olympics. Even if you win, you’re still retarded.” I loved your Neu Wave review and articles and your writings, but I’m just over it and not into the whole Rog thing. I’d rather not be involved. Gee thanks Mal, I love you too.

Eon Mckai starts off with a disclaimer- I’ll answer as long as it’s tasteful and respectful. I’m not into mean spirited shit, so I personally would avoid that. I’m not much of a writer and so much more a lover than a fighter. He does answer some of my questions, but doesn’t say much.

Dave Naz answers truthfully and thoughtfully, but says as little as possible.

Octavio Winktiki answers irreverently, without fear and with a killer sense of humor. I guess I know whom I would most like to hang out with!

Cindi:What makes it an ALT movie, rather a regular porno, is it the type of girls, the sets, the clothes, the sex, the open-mindedness overall, the storyline, all of the above, something else?

  • Eon: What everyone in the video market forgets is that Altporn started it’s life on the net and was mostly made up of soft core or pinup stills on pay sights… There were videos here and there on the net… Raver porn.net had some hard core boy girl right off the bat… but material like that was pretty rare.
  • Winky: Not sure… It’s more of a brilliant approach to make the good ole “rub and tug” flicks appealing to some people that would otherwise deny owning them. It’s kinda like: Owning Village People Records= you’re Hip, cool and got some Metro-style. Owning the N’sync collection = Bro, You are so gay… The other day I went to eat at one of ’em “Asian Fusion” digs they have on the Westside, I later figured that if they took off the fancy light fixtures, the slimline furniture, toned down the house music, the neon paint and turned on the fluorescents, You’re back at fucking Panda Express. I guess that’s the only way they’d get the white man to come eat there. And Darn… that’s what I love about America. Whether Alt.(Art.Fark)..or regulation Porn.. They both have people fucking..period. So as far as the judge is concerned, That’s what I was shooting in my backyard the other day.

Fill in the blank- Reviewers that hate your movies are _________

  • Cindi: Fuddy duddys, old-fashioned, over 40 year olds who watch reruns of “I dream of Jeannie” and masturbate.
  • Eon: Taking porn too seriously and just trying to keep us down. and really want to critic are PR style and not the movie many times.
  • Dave: Negative talk before the first movie on Vivid-Alt comes out shows how closed-minded some people are and dates the person dishing it out.
  • Winky: The ones who haven’t seen them…also My Credit card company, My friends, my landlord, my girlfriend and the bar down the street cuz I still owe them money and no matter how many free “ALT” movies I give them, I’m still broke.

Fill in the blank- Reviewers that love your movies are ___________

  • Cindi: brilliant, ahead of their time, open minded, forward thinking, in line with twenty-something’s point of view.
  • Eon: Confident
  • Winky: The ones on the Payola list and Any beer chuggin, red-meat-eating, NASCAR watching , NRA card carrying Male who gets a kick out of watching those funny lookin Suicide-Pinup-Girl Types actually take it up the ass.

I think that the pre-cursor to ALT was such movies as the Gothsend series, do you agree?

  • Eon
  • : No I had my eye on stuff like Supercut.com’s “the young idea” and Benny Prfianes Psycho candy

  • Winky: I’ve never seen the Gothsend…( first thing that comes to mind is the camera guy having to re-white balance the camera every time they’d take their clothes off). Web-wise there were some cool amateur homepages like Punkpussy, I used to love that site, There were like 6 girls “very hot…There is a lot of amateur Vid out there that was kinda cool ,then Burning Angel, SG.,Gothic Sluts, SinGarden came out which made it hard to decide where the spend my 10 bucks allowance.. I’ve also busted a nut or two hanging outside hot-topic. As far as Corporate video, Art school sluts and Little Runaway first come to mind. (and if my friends are reading this..Please return them!)

What are the newest movies out or coming out?

  • Eon: Girls Lie end of next month
  • Dave: ReBelle Rousers: Out Now, Skater Girl Fever: Sept 1st.
  • Winky: There’s a lot of cool stuff in the works and upcoming by Vivid-alt like Girls Lie, Dana Dearmond, My new one Man’s Ruin, Kimberly Kane is also working on one. I know other companies like VCA ,Burning Angel, RazorDolls etc,,have some coming releases I wanna see. I also hear Ultraman is coming to DVD too.

How do you come up with your story lines?

  • Dave: I recall my adolescent fantasies.
  • Winky: For the Story line aka ‘script’,
    I have the rule of MAX-Fives, which seems to be the formula for these things:

    1. 5 dialog lines per model- TOTAL
    2. 5 Words per line- MAX
    3. use vocabulary a 5th grader could read and understand
    4. Don’t spend more than 5 minutes to shoot it.
    5. It shouldn’t take more than 5 seconds at 5x FFW to get past thru it
    6. The scene technically starts when there’s at least 5 inches down her throat.
    7. And if it’s a good scene, Anyone should be able to rub a good one out in 5 minutes.

What inspires your creativity? What squelches it?

  • Dave: Having creative friends who inspire me and seeking out good art.
  • Winky: Happy hour, 2-for-1 lapdance specials, a paycheck, others way more talented than me, classic movies like ones with Charles Bronson or Shirley temple, and The potential trouble I’d get in if I didn’t get off my ass and deliver the movie I promised. Squelches- The True Fact that 95% of those buying it will FF thru all the “creative Stuffs” (see above) and go straight to the hot nasty goods.

Is ALT a “trend”? Short term? or Long term? Do you believe that ALT will evolve further into the next trend? What will that be?

  • Eon: Alt is the vehicle these artist are riding in. Much like the dogma95 movement. The name helps us find are audience. Once the work is done alt could be put to rest.
  • Winky: Dunno…My notion of future doesn’t go beyond the next 2 weeks. Plus, I’m the wrong one to ask cuz as old as I am, I still dress up and listen to same shit I used to in 1986. And Trend or not.. once we’re not cool no more , I’ll just wait 25 years for the “ALT” revival and those of us who are out of rehab, jail or touring Japan can attend the ALT revival tour and try to figure out if we were actually there..

What are the benefits of ALT porn? The detriments?

  • Cindi: I think the answer to both questions is the same depending on your view point- a younger, hipper, 18-25 demographic, including a high percentage of females, viewing and renting and buying these types of movies, that weren’t into porn before.
  • Eon: the benefits are your are now the flavor of the month
  • Winky: Scientific studies have concluded that “ALT” porn has some beneficial and redeeming social values to modern society when properly marketed to the 18-25 demographic in urban areas within 20 miles of a mall, a liquor store and rehab center.
    1. ALT porn provides young girls with role models they can look up- No longer are their careers restricted due to their looks and interests to jobs in Retail ,bartending and construction.
    2. Provides Gutter punks and Runaways with up close grooming and Hygiene examples thru their movies.
    3. ALT porn brings up property values in low-mid class communities thru the filming of its movies in “real-to-life” locations such as your buddy’s garage, Chip’s neighbors-roomate’s-cousin’s house, The bar up the street and condemned warehouses and starving artist lofts.
    4. ALT porn encourages troubled teens with incentives to stay in school so they can learn important social skills such as Blogging, message board participation, photography and social-online networking as these are mandatory if you wanna be an ALT superstar.
    5. Drugs are bad..they bad..
    6. Detriments- the 18-25 web-savvy-creative group ALT is aimed to is the same demographic that has the skills and knowledge to Rip DVD’s, burn complete Music libraries and openly share it with their other peers who have the same excitement for our work. And then the fuckers want free stickers!

Where would you be and what would you be doing if you weren’t in the porn business?

  • Cindi: I would have finished my schooling, been a tax attorney for the IRS, and ended up shot by a taxpayer or in the looney bin OR I would have quit school, continued to manage a video store, done way too much partying and ended up in the looney bin. So actually writing about porn has keep me relatively sane and alive!
  • Eon: Teaching and/or working as a editor.
  • Dave: I’d still be a photographer, making money shooting something else.
  • Winky: I’d probably be a politician and then work at becoming Governor. My MOTTO for election: “A chicken in every pot..and a dancer in every Lap”
  • Cindi: Winky, I have to introduce you to my friend Mary! (Carey)

More info on these directors and Alt porn can be found at VividAlt.com.

If you like my stuff please stop by my daily adult news site CindisNakedTruth.com.

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