Xcalibur: The Lord of Sex

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Roger T. Pipe

It started as a cure for writers block. I was working on some other projects and would come home every night and write in a journal as a warm up. One day, I was reading alt.sex.movies and found some reviews of porn flicks. I've always loved movies and porn, so I decided to review some tapes form my personal porn collection. I wrote a review, found that I liked it and posted it to asm. The feedback was positive and I just kept writing. I found it a great way to get me started each day, writing about something I enjoyed and pretty soon, people were asking me to review their films and work on a web site. The rest, as they say, is history.

Overall Rating [9/12]
★★★★★★★★★☆☆☆
Female Looks [11/12]
★★★★★★★★★★★☆
Male Looks [8/12]
★★★★★★★★☆☆☆☆
Picture Quality [8/12]
★★★★★★★★☆☆☆☆
Extras [9/12]
★★★★★★★★★☆☆☆
Plot Acting [5/12]
★★★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
Sex [9/12]
★★★★★★★★★☆☆☆

Reviews >> Movie Reviews >> Xcalibur: The Lord of Sex

Xcalibur: The Lord of Sex

www.Private.com

MOVIE TYPE: Feature

170 Mins.

Woodman Entertainment

www.NinnWorx.com

www.WoodmanEntertainment.com

DIRECTOR: Pierre Woodman

THEMES: Costumes, Outdoor Sex, Euro Babes

CONDOMS: None Noted

2007

9/06

STARS: Mona Lee, Carla, Jasmania Berber, Theodora Ferrari, Boroka Balls, Katy Belins, Janet Joy, Caylian Curtis, Divinity Love, Nataly D’Angelo, Alain DeLoin, Roxy Panther, Reda Semlahem, Mickael Cherito, Kety Bleins, Bob Terminator, Kevin Long, Theo Moulu, Nikky Sun, Vito Corleone, Eufrat Tenka, Anita Slager, Igor Demler, Steve Q, Carla Cox, Marcel Dutour, Lara Stevens, Sloan Mitchel, Stephanie Sierra, Vanessa Buss, Jan Nivianovitch, Cynthia Moury, Mona Lee, Roger Ventuvini,

REVIEW-

Pierre Woodman is back folks. Not sure that he ever left, but he’s got a new project for us to enjoy. On the surface it looks to be very similar to some of the stuff he is famous for. It’s a big swords and sorcerers epic filled with gorgeous women, lavish locations and great costumes. This is the kind of movie that helped Woodman put Private at the top of the porn market. Will he bring the same great sense of sexuality to the table now that he’s working with NinnWorx? Or will he go with the Ninn style over substance view of porn? (I can almost feel all of your cringing at the thought.) Don’t worry folks, he hasn’t gone total gloss on us. There are still plenty of gorgeous Euro-babes getting fucked in every hole in full motion for us to stroke to. Since this is the first part of the trilogy, be ready for a lot of story, a number of plotlines and a whole lot of well fucked Euro-babes.

After the first epic battle, three of the defeated women are freed from their bonds in prison long enough to serve as sex slaves. There is a quick bit of three on three action that simply cuts away to our two leads getting together for an outdoor scene. I don’t like cutting like this and the outdoor action progresses so quickly that we barely get a chance to enjoy the hot blonde sucking before she mounts his staff and pumps it hard. Just about the time we have settled in for the hot fucking on the rocks, we cut back into the prison. The action inside is harder to follow, but we’re switching from one hot chick being fucked to another. It’s hard to lose with this much eye candy in the room. The one on one action is very hot with our beautiful blonde starlet taking every inch of cock right up her tight ass. Inside, the girls seem to have adjusted to their new roles as sex toys and get into some dirty anal action as well. They end up wearing or eating loads given to them.

A post-battle celebration includes dancing, some dude twirling a flaming stick and of course, group sex. It looks an awful lot like the last scene. There are some very pretty, exceptionally thin brunettes in the middle of some heavily dressed guys looking to wet their willies. If you like group action, there is plenty to be happy about. We get a very hot chick in the center of the bang riding hard in RCA. Everywhere you look there is an attractive young woman being stuffed with cock. Sometimes they even take two at once.

An hour into the movie, we cut down the number of girl considerably for the next scene. Upset that his wife can’t give him a son, the master of the castle turns to a couple of chamber maids for some release. He has really good taste when it comes to staff and has a great time plugging the blonde and the redhead. After so much group action it is kind of a relief to watch two chicks without having to cut away to something else. I can’t blame him for pulling the blonde up for some hot RCA, but I don’t know how that is going to give him a son. So far this is the best scene of the movie by a long shot.

The other kingdom is run by a woman who has no love for any man. Despite a prophecy that says her heirs shall one day sit on the throne, this hot blonde insists on being strictly vegetarian in her diet. To clear her mind of the awful prospect of fucking a guy, she has two of her pretty young servants service her as well. The lovely young ladies serve the gorgeous queen nicely and even break out some toys to make things more interesting. Those toys find their way deep into the bowels of some very hot ladies. The queen herself does some serious self ass fucking that is sure to make you wish she weren’t so stuck on other chicks.

The task of recovering Xcalibur has been left to a beautiful young warrior. She takes a break from her training to abuse her position of power a bit. Ordering one guy to lick her pussy, she leans back and takes two meat swords into her hungry mouth. Three men means three dicks so she slides on top of one while working the other two with her hands and mouth. With all of her training, this pretty girl is ready to take on a small army and that is pretty much what she does here. The guys stand her up and take turns fucking her from behind. By the time she is done, she is covered in sweat as well as spunk. That’s quite a work out.

We’ve got something else brewing with the wizard in the cave. He has been charged with creating a magic potion. In return he is given a beautiful, busty virgin. She is on her knees with one hand stroking a cock while he sucks the other. The lighting on this scene could be better for the sexual heat, but this girl is enough to make it fantastic. Her energy isn’t so great when they DP her, but she is just so fucking hot that you won’t want to turn away as she take their hot jizz all over her pretty face.

The princess is left in charge of the Kingdom and goes right for the lesbian sex. This time it’s by the water on a dock with a pretty brunette. I’m not used to fake tit in Woodman movies so this blonde seem a bit out of place. She’s still very hot though and seem to enjoy burying her face between her friend’s sweet lips.

As part one comes to an end, a poor blonde is part of a caravan that is ambushed. When our avenging angel orders two of her henchmen to do with the “English whore” what they will, they are only too happy to follow orders. She is a very hot looking chick who sucks cock like her life literally depends on it. They slide her on top of one dick and she doesn’t slow down for a second. Her hips pump double time as she takes it in the pussy and then the ass. We even get to watch her do some hot circular motion with her hips as she smiles and proves to be quite the effective ass whore. That big smile is plastered all over her face as the guys spray her down with two big load to close the movie.

There is a lot going on in this movie. Fans of the Woodman epics of the past will love it. It is long, involved and sexually hot. The story isn’t too bad, though it is a little tough to follow since all of the women look and sound alike. I loved the outdoor action and as the movie moves on the groups get smaller. There are some great outdoor scenes here, really hot costumed sex and a story that is interesting enough. You have to sit through the usual dubbed dialog, but the primary appeal here is the women. Woodman knows what he does best and sticks to it. To their credit, the folks at NinnWorx simply let him do his thing and helped bring it to the people. If you love Euro-babes, costumes, outdoor sex, swords and sorcerers or any of the old Private epics then hop on board the new Woodman express and just enjoy the magic.


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